Desi Aragon

Modern Day Muse

Fairness is not Sameness

Somehow, somewhere in childhood we may have come to expect that life should be fair. That we should all be treated equally, that what he or she gets I should get too. But is that really true? If people treated me they way they treated my husband, I would be pretty unhappy. They would give me time to play golf, ask me to repair a broken pipe, and even expect me to lift something really heavy. Not one of those things falls into a category of love for me. I wouldn’t enjoy them the way my husband does. The truth is I am not my husband. And, fairness doesn’t necessarily mean that we should get the SAME treatment as everyone else.

So how is it that we have come to expect that life should be fair? Is it a part of our innate programming? Did we learn at school? at work? Did someone tell us that is what we should expect? However, the message got programmed, I would love to suggest we eliminate this idea from our thinking. Life is not fair and it shouldn’t be. You will be blessed with many wonderful joys in this lifetime. Sometimes others will experience the same joys, sometimes they won’t. You may face some hardships in this lifetime that are yours to face alone. Other times you will have people to share in the journey. No one else can make things fair, right or OK for you. Whatever happens let’s stop looking for things to be fair and start looking for how things are especially right for your journey in this lifetime. Trust that – if you are walking through a hardship or experiencing great joy – you are on the right path and knowing exactly what to do.

Love love love,


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