Finding Freedom From Emotional Blind Spots
Have you ever been driving and thought you were clear to change lanes only to hear a horn blare warning you not to do it?
This has certainly happened to me. That car was in a tiny blind spot that the side view and rear view mirrors just can’t see. It always shakes me up a little. The fact that I can’t see a 2000-pound car is what catches me off guard.
Well, I’m here to tell you we have emotional blind spots too!
They seem to come out of nowhere when you least expect them. And they can give out loud warning sounds or hit you like a ton of bricks!
Shine The Inner Light
So, how do we shine the light on emotional blind spots, reveal them and clear them out before they cause troubles? The most effective way I know is to start by taking a personal inventory.
Maybe there’s someone in your personal life or a situation at work that annoys you. Maybe it’s something that happened a long time ago or a few moments ago. Grudges and resentments tend to linger if they are not handled right away. And, believe me, it takes time and skills to learn how to appropriately handle difficult situations/emotions in the moment, so don’t beat yourself up if you held on to something too long. In fact, if you find you are beating yourself up, add that to the list. You could be holding resentments against yourself.
Get quiet and go deeper within. Sense if there is something lurking just out of sight. Anything that seems to create a defensive or uncomfortable reaction is worth exploring. Look for what’s hiding in the blind spots. Try to sense if there is something that you have resisted thinking about. Thoughts we push into the furthest parts of our brain are the ones that most need our attention.
At one event, Wayne Dyer told the following story about an African tribe and how they heal tribal members who have done something antisocial or delinquent.
“In the Babemba tribe, when a person acts irresponsibly or unjustly, he or she is placed in the center of the village, alone and unfettered. All work ceases, the entire village gathers around the accused individual, then each person of every age begins to talk out loud to the accused. One at a time each person tells all the good things that the one in the center ever did in his or her lifetime. Every incident, every experience that can be recalled with any detail and accuracy is recounted. All positive attributes, good deeds strengths and acts of kindness are recited carefully and at length. No one is permitted to fabricate, to exaggerate or to be facetious about the accomplishments or the positive aspects of the accused person. The tribal ceremony often lasts several days, not ceasing until everyone is drained of every positive comment that can be mustered. At the end, the tribal circle is broken, a joyous celebration takes place, and the person is symbolically welcomed back into the tribe. The necessity for such ceremonies is rare; it only occurs once in every 4 or 5 years.”
Time For Emotions To Catch Up
Modern cars now have side mirrors that include a small inner mirror to help us view blind spots in a whole new way. It is time for our emotional skills to catch up with our vehicles. Noticing your emotional blind spots requires you to do a personal inventory and go deep within. Once you’ve named what’s troubling you, you can practice the work of the Babemba tribe. Treat each troubling thought about a person or circumstance in your life in the same way the Babemba tribe treats the accused in their village. The inner light of truth will ultimately dissolve anything that appears to be negative or frightening. As a result there will be no more scary thoughts to blind-side you. This is a great way to begin or end the year and a great way to keep those blind spots cleared on a quarterly basis.
Here’s to a Happy New Year free and clear of emotional blind spots!